So my boyfriend broke up with me a couple days ago. It wasn't a big deal because he wasn't happy and I want him to do whatever makes him happy. But the thing is, we still live together and he's being awkward about it all even though he was the one saying he still wanted to be friends. We have to share a room and bed til July when he leaves though. I don't know if he still has feelings and that's why he's being awkward or what. What do you think?
You have to take time apart, it’s just a necessary part of the process. If that means taking turns crashing at a friends place for a weekend or a week. Or rotating for a few days. But you need to take some time apart to adjust to your new lives and relationships with out each other. Break ups are very hard to deal with on both ends of the coin, so you both need to understand that if you don’t want to be together, you have to actually stop being together. If you’re only able to take a few days break right now, it will still be very beneficial to both of your perspectives and abilities to handle the situation. Once you’re able to both get more comfortable with the idea of being apart there will be less to feel awkward about and hopefully you’ll be able to change your romantic relationship to a friendship and you can still care for and support each other no matter whom you choose as your partner. Good luck, be fair, be honest and it’s ok to be upset. You’ll both be fine in due time.
Should I be offended that my boyfriend doesnt love the taste when he's eating me out? I asked him if he liked it or disliked it, and he said "neither, its ok". I dont know if I should keep letting him do it to me, or just skip it. For me, I absolutely love sucking him off. Is there something wrong with me down there, could I improve/make it taste lovely?
No, you don’t need to be offended. He might just be being honest about how he feels. And he did not say anything negative, he just missed an opportunity to say something positive. Do you often taste yourself? I think it’s a good thing for everyone to be aware of, especially if you’re expecting someone else to taste you. And you certainly can improve the taste of any of your bodily fluids. The healthier the food and liquids your body consumes, the better your everything will taste. Also showering together can possibly help you both feel better about it. But maybe your boy just needs to grow up and appreciate how delicious the taste of a women really is.
My friend and I had sex at his house and he had to be really quiet because of his neighbors downstairs. I thought this just meant I couldn't moan but he kept making us stop if the bed moved too much. (Big turn off when you're in the heat of the moment.) What are some good positions to do in a bedroom without making the bed creak too much? (On the bed, standing up, against the wall?) Thanks!!!
As always you’ve got a lot of options, but I’d suggest ditching the bed all together. Throw blankets and pillows on the floor, or even pull the whole mattress off. Creating a unique space to fuck can make it extra exciting. Against the wall works great too, you can whisper in each others ears “You better not make a sound.” while teasing and pleasing your bodies. Telling your partner to quiet down can feel like orgasm denial which is a big turn on for some people. Also getting your loud fucking done during the day is a good thing, just play some music to mask out all the bed and voice sounds and you can go wild together. At night take advantage of the noise restriction and be quiet and slow. You can focus on your bodies and kinks even more, and buy a ball gag or two. Also don’t forget about how good your panties in an open mouth can muffle any sounds being made.
is it normal to want to be tied up like the pictures you've been recently posting but not in a dominating way? like I love when my boyfriend ties me up and fucks me but in a passionate loving way. I don't know if that's normal or not but I don't like the idea of someone hurting me or "fucking me like they hate me" maybe it's just the hopeless romantic in me but I also love the idea of being tied up and choking is something that gets me off as well. it's like two different sides of the spectrum
Oh dear what an important question and thank you very much for asking. How you feel is absolutely normal, and I like bondage and rough sex the same way. For us when I tie up Trouble, the enjoyment does not come from making her restricted so I can do what I want with her, the pleasure comes from knowing that she feels restricted and she knows that I can do what I want with her. Her submission and excitement is what turns me on, and also Trouble and I switch so it makes being tied up much more fun when you know you get to return the favor to your partner. The same goes with slapping and choking. I think how you feel is the most common way, though it is still normal for someone to enjoy the “fuck me like you hate me” kind of sex. And I think there is a place for romance in both situations.
What advice would you offer to a 20 year old virgin who's not really comfortable or confident enough with her body to take the plunge yet? I have a very low self esteem and while boys have taken an interest in me in the past, I've always turned them away for some reason or another. I'm feeling like I'm finally ready to get into an intimate relationship, but the only problem is that I'm not confident enough with my body. Any tips? <3 the blog btw, it's wonderful.
I don’t think you should decide when to have sex based on how you feel about your body but it is an important first step. I think you should decide to have sex when you have found someone who appreciates you and your body. It sounds like you should take more time to focus on your self and your own sexuality, and work on building a relationship with someone you’re interested in, even just as friends. Someone who adores you and cares for you can do wonders for your own confidence and when you feel comfortable with them you’ll also feel confident. There is no need to rush, life is long and 20 is young.
Thank you for always posting pictures of people different shapes and sizes. It makes me happy to see so many people appreciating the human body in its entirety and not just one version of it. Thank you for your blog- it's truly helped me connect with myself and love my body the way it is. What a beautiful community for all of us ninjas. Xx.
You are absolutely welcome, it’s a pleasure to share the beauty of the natural body with so many people, and it means a lot to hear it is appreciated. I’m very glad to help anyone connect with themselves and their body. Thank you very much for letting us know.
I'm looking to get a professional-grade camera for personal use. What is your favorite camera and lens combo?
I shoot with the Canon Rebel T2i, I think it’s a great camera that has everything a new photographer could want and since the model is 4 or 5 years old it’s an affordable option as well. if you can spend a bit more the T3i has a movable view screen which would be very helpful when shooting self portraits. The important thing though is that with the rebel bodies you need a good lens, my favorite is Carl Zeiss 50 mm the lens is more expensive than the camera but I think it’s worth it. Alternatively any 50mm lens will do and help you add focal depth and sharpness to your photos.
have you seen The Nymphomaniac (2013)? what is your opinion about that
Trouble and I went to see Nymphomaniac parts 1 & 2 last night and I was very disappointed. I think it is a very irresponsible film that had nothing significant or relevant in it. I think it is basically an attempt at Von Trier to further cash in on being considered “controversial” and he went about it in the easiest way possible. The film reinforces negative stereotypes for sexuality and race with out commenting or justifying why. It was very frustrating to watch and I gave up hoping it would be a good film ten minutes into the first movie, I definitely don’t recommend it to anyone. Especially since it’s unnecessarily and arrogantly long, don’t waste your time.
I have a technical question. What are some ways to get good lighting when the sun's gone down? My ceiling light is always too harsh for nice pictures.
Buy some lamps and use a low watt bulb, any second hand store or Salvation Army is a great place for old lamps and they always create beautiful lighting. Be sure to do a light test and see where you should have the lamp, either below or above or beside or where ever creates the mood you want best.
Hey there, I'm haven't seen that much on your blog about bondage. My partner and I are new to it, and we've tried some simple tying with rope, but we don't really know where to find how to do it. Any advice or tutorial sort of things? (a link would be great if you have any). Thank you! By the way, I really enjoy all the pictures and other things that you post.
I’m sure some good googling will bring about all sorts of tutorials for you to learn from but from my experience if you’re a beginner it might be best to just improvise. When Trouble and I play with rope we just let our creativity flow with the moment, sometimes we end up doing semi-traditional style bondage and sometimes we come up with things we’ve never seen before. I think it’s helped us become more comfortable with the idea of bondage and rope play and will help us when we do decide to learn some more advanced techniques.
So Trouble's a feminist then?
Definitely. I think every woman should have the right to choose who she wants to be, without stigma, sexism, or violence.
Trouble, how do you feel about the Abortion Insurance Opt-Out Act? It has been passed in Michigan, and bans insurance agencies in the state from covering abortion, except in cases where birth would kill the mother. This means that rape victims will be forced to bear the children from their attack as well as purchase additional insurance to cover the procedure, as though they should anticipate being raped.
I think it’s very sad and backwards that this exists. Especially given how much dialogue there has been lately over women’s rights and the lack of empathy for the justification of rape. Having a woman feel she has to prepare for rape or even consider it as a possibility reaffirms that rape is still being looked at as an unavoidable fault of man, rather than educating those most at risk to rape others against it. It is extremely archaic and insulting to women. I’d like to face the man (I’m going to assume it was a man) who created this act and ask him just why he thinks it’s okay for women to accept being raped as a potential health risk and why the victim of the rape should then pay out of pocket to avoid carrying an unwanted child if they don’t. What next? Will women have to pay the rent of the jail cell of the rapists they convict?
Hello! First if all I would like to say that I love your blog so much! I do have a question and maybe you guys can help me. I'm a virgin, but I do masturbate and I've climaxed before. The other day my boyfriend fingered me for the first time and nothing happened. I was that turned on when we started and every time I would be close to feeling anything he would stop. My question is: what do you guys think went wrong, and should I tell him?
If your boyfriend is fingering you for the first time it’s likely he has no idea what it is that actually gets you off yet and needs some help in learning that. I’m sure your boyfriend just didn’t know you were getting close and needed you to urge him on and let him know how you were feeling. The next time he fingers you just keep him in check with your body and let him know what feels good. A simple “don’t stop, I’m so close” can work wonders sometimes.
Dearest Ninja and Trouble, i would like to take a moment to thank you tremendously for giving me a new sense of excitement in my relationship with my Andrew. Weve recently been exploring our dom/sub sides, and playing with what we like. We've let ourselves be inspired by the relationship you two share with us, and do plan to submit us to you quite soon. We were, hoewever wondering, do you accept stortly submitions? We have very euphoric experiences we'd love to share with you and fellow ninjas x
No we don’t know post full story submissions, but feel free to show off any of your experiences through photographs and brief write ups. Also if you would like to share I encourage you to create a blog of your own to keep them together and let others see. And thanks for the kind words, we’re glad to help and inspire.