Anonymous

I am confused if I have what would be called a 'fettish' or just something I prefer. Recently I have been really attracted to transgender bodies. The femininity of a beautiful face but having a penis or the manliness of a face but having a vagina. I don't know what it is and I am sure the people in question must struggle with their bodies or maybe not, I don't know. It's just something I would struggle to explain to others. Any suggestions? I am sorry if I am insulting anybody, it's not intended

Being attracted to transgender bodies is a preference that I’m sure you share with many. I think it’s something you should explore and deepen your knowledge of by making some transgendered friends and getting to know their experience. Last night I was hanging out with a friend who gave his first blowjob to a woman he didn’t know was mtf. He said when he discovered her penis he was surprised but couldn’t really think of anything else to do in the moment. He said she was someone he was into and was excited by their touch and wanted to pleasure them, regardless of assigned gender and is looking forward to seeing them again. I couldn’t help but feel like his explanation of the whole act was really beautiful and inspiring and I would hope anyone you told about your relationships would feel the same. 
-Trouble

Anonymous

Im 22 and I've never had sex, at least I don't think I have. When ever I've tried to have sex with my boyfriend, I get really nervous and self conscious and it's just really hurts when he tries to put it in, so I stop him. And I just really wanna have sex and I want to enjoy sex :/

Allow yourself to relax and enjoy the experience. There is nothing to be nervous about as long as you two are safe and there is good communication between you about what feels good and what doesn’t. Use lube to make sure he slides in easy and go slow. Trust that any self conscious thoughts are distortions and being confident and showing care and attraction towards your partner will ensure a good experience for both of you. 
-Trouble

Anonymous

Is it reprehesible to go to a sexworker to lose my virginity? I'm now in my mid-20s, have never had a relationship or any sexual experience with a woman and I'm tired of it. At the same time, I'm asking myself what a possible partner would think if I'd say to her that I never had sex. And I fear most women (and men, too!) aren't so symphatetic like you both and the wonderful people on this site...

It’s certainly not reprehensible to go to a sexworker to lose your virginity or in general, but I wouldn’t go to one out of fear or expectation that a potential future partner will take issue with your virginity. There are definitely people you could meet who are either in the same boat as you or don’t care about your sexual experiences before them and are willing to show you the way. If you decide to go to a sex worker go to one because you understand that they are non-judging professionals that would ensure your first experience is whatever you would need it to be. 
-Trouble

gingermonkey76

Hi there, I hope you are both well. Your blog is amazing! I really want to buy a bracelet. When will they be available again?

It’s hard to say. Our bracelet guy has taken a break and we’re currently looking for new artisans to come up with the next edition of NN black band bracelets. I have a talented friend who makes jewellery and am hoping she’ll come up with something really awesome. 
-Trouble

whoopshere-i-am

Ninja and trouble, do you two plan on getting married one day? Or are you? Sorry I haven't been following to long... But I absolutely love your blog! Xo

Ninja and I don’t plan on anything, other than being nice to each other for as long as that feels right. 
-Trouble

drunkmischief

Hey, I've been thinking about getting into posting more and submitting pics of myself places, but i dont want to be just another guy showing off his dick, i want to make the pics appealing. I have heard you guys have awesome male submissions, could you possibly link me a few good references to give me some ideas on good male nsfw pics? Please and thank you!

We have so many great male submissions, so be sure to scroll through for even more inspiration. It’s easy to get away from the classic dick pick and still show off your stuff if you’re creative. Experimenting with your pose can help make your submission more interesting. Or playing around with focus and depth of field. Sometimes all it takes is beautiful lighting and capturing an honest moment to create a great submission. Hope this helps spark some ideas. 
-Trouble

Anonymous

What are some safe word recommendations? We don't want it to sound silly necessarily, but we aren't entirely sure. It would be something you would never say even during a role play. Suggestions?

Just as long as it’s a word you both agree on that wouldn’t make sense in a sexual situation it doesn’t have to be silly. You could always pick a word but say it in another language so you can distinguish it as a safe word and don’t have to think about it’s real meaning in that moment.
-Trouble

Anonymous

I have a long labia and it's something I've been terribly self-conscious about for a very long time. The last guy I slept with who was very very attractive actually asked me why I "cover myself when I'm naked." Literally, every time he was not inside of me, my hand was covering it. I have wanted labiaplasty for so long, but I've heard it can make maters worse.. Is it normal? Is it completely unattractive? My body absolutely disgusts me anymore. :(

Yes, you’re completely normal, the problem isn’t you or your vagina and there is no need to feel you need to change it. The problem is that most pornography gives us an unrealistic standard of what all vaginas look like and the school system, particularly sexual education, doesn’t teach body positivity enough to prepare us for the inevitable insecurity women face around the appearance of their labia not being the same. Truth is our bodies are all so unique and beautiful in their own way. Long labias are common and normal and just as sexy as ones that aren’t so own them.
-Trouble

Anonymous

I consider myself a very sexual person, but I've only been with one person and, to say the least, he was disappointing. I've felt very strong attractions to women, too, but I'm scared to pursue those desires. I grew up with a homophobic and cruel father and while I know that me sleeping with another woman wouldn't be wrong, I still have this weird nagging feeling that I'm doing something wrong by thinking about it. I'm also terrified that I'd be bad at it.

What is more important to you? Living up to the expectations and criticisms of someone whose opinion you know is wrong, or being truly happy in your life and expressing yourself as you are? At some point we have to stop being subservient to our parents’ world view and trusting in our own needs as adults. As for being bad at it, women are very understanding creatures. So I’m sure anyone who you got involved with that knew it was new for you would help to guide you. You already know what you like on yourself so it’s easy to keep that in mind when you’re pleasuring another person. 
-Trouble

Anonymous

My boyfriend have been together for only 3 months, but we already have the best sex of my life and are talking about living together and perhaps getting married. Do you think it is too soon?

I’d advise not to get ahead of yourselves by discussing marriage so soon, it’s a big commitment and a step that you should definitely work towards. I know it’s exciting to talk about these things but it’s important to also to be realistic. As for moving in, I moved in with Ninja after just three months of dating so I can’t really criticize. Just be sure you’d be compatible room mates before doing so and be ready to face the challenge of moving out if it doesn’t work. Take it day by day, life is long and there’s no rush. 
-Trouble

Anonymous

What do you think about stretch marks? Does it usually turn a guy off significantly?

If it’s turning a guy off then he’s got his priorities wrong. Stretch marks are normal and beautiful. I love mine and would hope any person I am with feels the same.
-Trouble

Anonymous

My partner and I have been together for nearly two years now. Next month he is moving out of state for work. While he would like to try a long distance relationship, I feel that we have frazzled out. I don't know how to tell him delicately...

Remember that a goodbye face to face is better than one over the phone and though breakups are never easy it’ll be way better for your boyfriend to know he’s leaving starting fresh than to get to a new place and then have his relationship fall apart on him. It’s important to be as honest as possible about your needs and happiness and don’t leave out all of the positive things about your relationship that made it worth the two years you were together. If you’re feeling like you’ve lost interest in the relationship it wouldn’t be fair to stay in it for either of you so just sit him down for a conversation and be honest with him, it’s the nicest thing you can do for someone. 
-Trouble

w0lfmother

My boyfriend and I have been considering the prospect of living with each other more and more recently. What would you say is the hardest obstacle in your opinion when it comes to moving in together?

Not that it’s really a bad thing, but one of the only issues that I’ve experienced since moving in is wanting to spend all of our time together and not making as much time to see friends. It’s important to balance a healthy social life and spend time apart as much as together. It’s very easy to become a homebody and just spend all your time with your partner at home, but alone time is very important too. 
-Trouble

Anonymous

NN, my girlfriend of two years went on a study abroad in Denmark. Before she left i brought up the idea that she could have sex with one guy while she was out there (the idea of her still receiving sexual pleasure when I am unable to give it to her thrilled me) When she did this and told me(details and everything) it made me incredibly depressed. I didn't react in the aroused way i thought i would. I am frightened that I may begin to resent her. How could she want another man? Why did I do this?

Well you have absolutely no reason to resent her, so I’d stop worrying about that. You mention that you brought up the idea of her being with someone else, so she simply followed through with your suggestion. So the only person at fault here is you, I’d take this as a lesson learned. On paper all sorts of things can sound exciting and sexy but when put in practice they can end up being not very enjoyable after all. And it’s totally normal for anyone to have thoughts or desires for other people, and since you suggested and gave her permission she was totally in the right by hooking up with someone else. It’s not the end of the world, sex is sex, it’s not a big deal. If you both still want to be together that’s the most important part, and know you’ll appreciate her monogamy much more. 

Anonymous

Is it unattractive for a guy to have sex with a girl who shaves but is spiky? My fuck buddy wants to have sex with me more often but I don't like him seeing me when I'm not clean shaved because I get nervous that he's going to feel it and not want me anymore.

News flash, guys have to deal with having stubble too and any guy who shaves his face is aware of what it feels like and how fast hair grows back. If you prefer to be shaved and he doesn’t want you over something as simple as a bit of hair that likely won’t be there the next time you see him then he needs to adjust his expectations.
-Trouble