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I consider myself a very sexual person, but I've only been with one person and, to say the least, he was disappointing. I've felt very strong attractions to women, too, but I'm scared to pursue those desires. I grew up with a homophobic and cruel father and while I know that me sleeping with another woman wouldn't be wrong, I still have this weird nagging feeling that I'm doing something wrong by thinking about it. I'm also terrified that I'd be bad at it.
What is more important to you? Living up to the expectations and criticisms of someone whose opinion you know is wrong, or being truly happy in your life and expressing yourself as you are? At some point we have to stop being subservient to our parents’ world view and trusting in our own needs as adults. As for being bad at it, women are very understanding creatures. So I’m sure anyone who you got involved with that knew it was new for you would help to guide you. You already know what you like on yourself so it’s easy to keep that in mind when you’re pleasuring another person.
My boyfriend have been together for only 3 months, but we already have the best sex of my life and are talking about living together and perhaps getting married. Do you think it is too soon?
I’d advise not to get ahead of yourselves by discussing marriage so soon, it’s a big commitment and a step that you should definitely work towards. I know it’s exciting to talk about these things but it’s important to also to be realistic. As for moving in, I moved in with Ninja after just three months of dating so I can’t really criticize. Just be sure you’d be compatible room mates before doing so and be ready to face the challenge of moving out if it doesn’t work. Take it day by day, life is long and there’s no rush.
What do you think about stretch marks? Does it usually turn a guy off significantly?
If it’s turning a guy off then he’s got his priorities wrong. Stretch marks are normal and beautiful. I love mine and would hope any person I am with feels the same.
I had sex with a trans MTF boy tonight and he pleasured me more than any other man has ever done for me and he said the same. My parents hate him. But your blog is so sexually positive I just wanted to tell someone who would respond to it positively. Thank you for being so open and easy to confide in.
I hope you two are the reason why your parents change their mind about their preconceived notions about gender eventually. Really happy you two are mutually enjoying one another, it’s a really great thing.
I just had sex for the first time and I felt very good about it. I trusted the person, I'm almost 20 and it was consensual. My dad found out and didn't talk to me for 2 weeks. He says because of my depression I shouldn't have done it. Is he right?
No. He’s being a dad and is naturally protective of you. Using your mental health as a scapegoat to criticize your sexual decisions is unfair. Many people who live with depression are perfectly capable of making positive decisions for themselves and maintaining healthy sexual relationships with others. If you’re cognitively working to better yourself and believe you’re making choices that are in your best interest then you have nothing to feel bad about.
I'm in a relationship for almost a year that has been progressing nicely. I have dominant tendencies, a trait I shared with him when we met. He indulges me even though he's not inherently submissive. Our sex life is amazing and I even switched one night for him and let him have complete control. Last night he told me that he feels we do everything I want and nothing he wants. I was surprised and when I asked him what he wanted he couldn't tell me specifics. It was frustrating. Advice?
It sounds as if his dominant needs aren’t being met as equally as he’d hoped. You mention he was dominant as well when you met and tried switching once but I imagine he’s referring to needing more of a balance and doesn’t know how to communicate that. Try and encourage a switch more often so he can work out his needs, or if you’re less interested in being submissive maybe the two of you could find a third who is who you could enjoy dominating together.
Yesterday my boyfriend and I were messing around and he asked me what I wanted, and thanks to your blog and all the sexual positivity, I was able to ask for exactly what I wanted. We had some amazing rough sex and I have never felt so satisfied after. Plus my boyfriend loved everything about it. I just want to thank you for running an amazing blog and sending good vibes out about exploring yourself sexually
The benefits of communication.